I Will Remember Last Night for The Rest of My Life.
I will remember last night for the rest of my life.
Five years ago, in 2010, I performed at my first ever open mic night on stage, and from then on I was hooked. Music became the core of my existence, my culture, the avenue through which I met all of my best friends, and my definition of love and life and inspiration for what can be and is possible in this world.
Last night, as I arrived at the release show venue, I was immediately overwhelmed with joy as I was surrounded by my best friends, talented musicians, and my family, who all came hours early to help set up, decorate, and soundcheck. Usually in a big hectic situation like this, my anxiety would take over and I would be stressed to the max. But instead, I looked around the room at all of these people, as more of them arrived every minute to help, with the biggest smile across my face. Thinking to myself, "I love these people so much. How lucky am I to have them. How freaking lucky." How could I stress over anything at all when I have all of these beautiful people who will show up for me when I need them?
The energy inside of that room last night was absolutely magical. Family, friends, family of friends, local musicians who I respect and admire so deeply, and people I don't even know all showed up to fill the 240 seats and then some. I was given cards, flowers, hugs, and so many words of encouragement. I have never felt so full as I did last night.
Because I was on such a high, a lot of the things I planned to say on stage completely left my brain, so I want to say them now while I can remember. I named this album "Answers" because over the course of this journey with music, and life, I have realized that there are none. Growing up, I always would think to myself, "Am I doing things right? Did I handle that situation correctly? Was my reaction to that person how it should have been?" But it has since then dawned on me that there is no "Life Manual for Dummies" floating around anywhere to tell us if we are living the "right way." There are no answers, but instead only our own unique perspectives, where we decide what is right and good and true to us. Something that may offend one person might be hilarious to another. What hurts your feelings may not even phase somebody else's. And I find it so odd that our whole world argues over how to handle certain situations with money and politics and justice, as if there was, in fact, one correct answer at all. I wanted that to be my debut statement with this album. You decide what is and what isn't right, for you. And let others decide for themselves. And don't apologize for it. Life is beautiful and scary and wonderful. It is vastly small and simply confusing.
So once again, I just want to say thank you to everybody who came out to the show last night. As much as it was "my" album release, this night was much much greater than me. Wether it was to help run the event, perform with me on stage, or just to bring the gift of love and good energy, I appreciate you all from the deepest depths of my heart and soul. I will remember the sound of the applause, the exchanged glances with my friends on stage, the encore, and the whole room standing up to dance during the last song. Wow. What a night, what a life I was blessed with.
